Love, Shaun
Dear NICU Mama,
My hope for you in 2020 is that you never feel alone on an island. Welcome to the club no mama asks to be a part of. It’s membership consists of a rollercoaster ride of emotions from the highest of the highs, to the lowest of the lows. The day to day stress of the NICU coupled with unpredictable hormones is enough to drive anyone crazy. But mama, you are so much stronger than you know!
Please know that you are not alone. So many mamas all over the world are either in a similar position or have walked in your shoes. Find your tribe. It could be a local group or one of the many NICU social media groups on Instagram or Facebook. Share your story, listen to others, vent, cry and celebrate. Sometimes it is just helpful to be among those who share this common experience, even if it is just online. These mamas are lifelines on those difficult days and often turn into the friends we never knew we so desperately needed.
Allow yourself to feel every emotion along the way. Cry when you need to, and don’t ever feel weak about it. Celebrate even the smallest of milestones. No one speaks enough about how difficult it is to walk out of those hospital doors without this precious gift you have waited so long for. How your heart jumps when the phone rings and you see that NICU number. Or the excitement you feel when your tiny fighter finally gets to wear their first outfit! Your feelings and emotions are always valid. Live each moment no matter how badly you want to shut down. The days may seem long ,but before you know it, the NICU experience will be a distant memory that will always stick with you.
Most importantly, give yourself grace. As a new mama, you have been through a lot yourself and are going through so many physical and emotional changes. Allow yourself time to relax and heal. Many mamas feel the need to be at the NICU every minute of the day to the point of exhaustion. I was that mama. A wise a nurse once told me that we are no good to our babies if we are broken and exhausted ourselves. Rest when your body needs it. Our babies need us to be strong and ready for when they bust down those NICU doors! You’ve got this mama!” - Shaun
More of Shaun + Quinn, Hunter, and Wyatt’s stories:
Shaun’s triplets were born at 32 weeks and 6 days. Quinn was in the NICU 19 days and her brothers Hunter and Wyatt came home together at 29 days. Having triplets, they knew that NICU time would be almost impossible to avoid. It was just a matter of when and for how long. Even prepping for it from the very beginning didn't make the experience any easier or less lonely. They relied on each other, our tribe and the knowledge that our littles were in the best place possible to get us through each day.
