Love, Sade
“Dear NICU Mama, I know you can do this because I see you for all you are and all you are yet to become.
I see YOU with pain in your eyes, whilst feeling the pain in your body and the ache in heart. Yet you don’t acknowledge it, as your baby is your priority.
I see YOU sitting next to the incubator whispering positive affirmations over your baby, stroking the plastic, and hoping that they know you are there. Mama, they feel your presence and know they are loved.
I see YOU edge forward in your seat as the doctors are approaching. You wring your hands in your lap, and your brain feels dull from lack of sleep—yet you listen to every detail, ask questions, advocate for your child, and often ask questions again.
I see YOU hide your face as tears fall, walk out of the NICU when it all becomes too much, avoid people as you don’t have the energy for conversation, and stay awake all night thinking about what you could have done differently. You did everything you were supposed to do.
I see YOU with joy on your face. I hear the elation in your voice and the deep sighs of relief when the nurses say “today’s a good day.” Yet you can’t help but worry about what tomorrow may bring.
Mama, I know you can do it simply because you are doing it every minute of every day. It may be hopefully, haphazardly, bravely, cautiously, painfully, with anger, fear or guilt, but I see you ever present in the face of a surreal new reality. From one NICU mama to another, you’re doing amazingly.”
Love,
Sade
More of Sade + Micah’s NICU Journey:
“Following my 25-week midwife appointment, I began to have severe back pain. After a painful and restless night sleep, I contacted the hospital—rather hysterical—and asked to be reviewed. Initially I was reassured that it was likely to be a UTI; however, after examination I was informed I was 3cm dilated and in early labour. I was only 25 weeks and 1 day. I was sent by ambulance to a specialised unit, and our son Micah was born 4 days later at just 25 weeks and 5 days and only 1lb 14oz.”
