Why Dear NICU Mama?
After my son had transferred to Fargo’s NICU, the reality that we would be in the NICU for a while really set in. I suddenly felt the weight of it all the journey we had ahead of us - and a long with that, I began to feel the isolation and the loneliness. Social media became tough for me because I would see moms interacting and bonding with their healthy newborns, and I still had to ask permission to touch mine. I personally didn’t have any close friends who had had a baby in the NICU, and when I googled “blogs for NICU moms”, I only found a few articles with much of them emphasizing the fear and unknown and they didn’t give me hope.
I remember one morning I asked the nurse, “Would there ever be a mom here that would be willing to talk with me about their journey and how to do this? I feel very alone right now.” She asked the mom next door if she would be willing to talk with me and this mama happily agreed. It was the first mom I connected with who had also had an emergency c-section, a preemie, and a placental abruption. It was the first time I didn’t feel alone, and she became a familiar face and friend in the NICU that I didn’t know I needed. About a week later, another mom came and talked with me. She had been out of the NICU for over two years and shared so much wisdom, hope, and life with me. My heart desperately needed both of these friendships, which then began the stirring of a big dream in my heart.
What could it look like to connect other NICU mamas in our region? In our state? Across the Midwest and beyond? How many other mamas are journeying through the NICU or navigating life out of the NICU, who would find healing in sharing their story and connecting with other mamas who get it? How could I use my gifts and creative abilities to celebrate what these mamas have overcome and the miracles that their babies are?
I am so excited to introduce that dream with you today, Dear NICU Mama . On April 28th, we had our first celebration photo shoot, and we celebrated mamas who had babies in the NICU 17 years ago, and mamas who had babies in the NICU a few months ago. Mamas who had full term babies, and mamas who had preemies. While our stories and journeys varied, we had a kindred connection like none other. We celebrated and honored each other’s journeys and we wrote letters to mamas currently sitting in the NICU. My heart came alive in a new way that day, and a sisterhood was formed.
I’m not sure what will come of this project, but if there is one thing I am hoping and praying for? I hope and pray it unites other NICU mamas. I hope it brings other NICU mamas out of isolation and into a sisterhood of women who can understand and celebrate their journey in a way that makes them feel less alone. If you know of a NICU mama, please comment their names on this post or show them the DNM page and website. There is also a private Facebook group for NICU mamas to share, connect, and to grow. To stir hope and to celebrate all that they have journeyed through.
I consider it an honor to know these mamas. They are some of the strongest women I know, and I am honored to stand alongside of them this Mother’s Day! Mother’s Day has a whole new meaning now that I am a mom myself, but also because I understand that the road to motherhood is not always an easy one. Sometimes it’s 87 days in the NICU. But my oh my, I’m so glad I don’t have to journey through it alone.
Click here to be added to the private Facebook group. <3
