Love, Kasey

 “Dear NICU mama, You embodied courage the very instant you became a NICU mama.

You embodied courage when you had seconds to mentally prepare that your baby was going to be born, and not as you imagined how.

You embodied courage the first time you saw your baby through the walls of their isolette, tears rushing down your face.

You embodied courage every time you walked out of those doors and trusted the NICU staff with your baby.

You embodied courage when you couldn't leave your baby's side even when the constant beeps from the monitors gave you debilitating anxiety.

You embodied courage every time you held or touched your baby, staring at their tiny body covered in tubes and wires, feeling fear and love take over you entirely.

You embodied courage when you learned how to ‘stimulate’ your baby as you watched their saturations drop.

You embodied courage when you stepped out or stayed in the room while your baby was getting poked and prodded.

You embodied courage every time you sat down with the doctors trying to understand the medical language and diagnosis.

You embodied courage when you pumped every 3 hours with your baby sometimes nowhere in sight.

You embodied courage when you stopped pumping for the sake of your mental health.

You embodied courage getting emotional when you saw a mom with her full term healthy baby walk out of those hospital doors while you were outside getting some fresh air.

You embodied courage when the unknowns and uncertainties engulfed you, but you consistently put one foot in front of the other walking through those NICU doors, showing up and fighting for your little warrior.

You embodied courage when you explained to friends and family why they couldn't hold or touch your baby yet.

When you feel more broken than you ever have, know the courage you have as a NICU mama is unbreakable. Your courage is embedded in you and it is shown constantly through the love and advocacy you give to your baby. When you feel an overwhelming sense of loneliness, know that your fellow NICU sisters see your incredible courage, believe in your incredible courage, and can relate to the incredible courage you never imagined you would have.

Dear NICU mama, YOU embody courage.”

Love,
Kasey

More of Kasey + Sawyer’s NICU Journey:

“My husband and I were on vacation in Maui when I went into preterm labor. I had just turned 24 weeks pregnant. We were completely shocked and confused because I had a normal and healthy pregnancy with no complications prior. I was airlifted to Oahu and hospitalized for 8 days to slow down the labor. I was discharged from the hospital but told to stay no more than 10 minutes from the hospital until I hopefully made it to 30 weeks where they would feel more comfortable with me flying home. Just 5 days later our son, Sawyer, was quickly born at 25 weeks and 6 days, weighing 1 pound and 15.9 ounces. Sawyer was in the NICU for 96 days and overcame 2 infections, 4 blood transfusions, osteopenia, ROP, a flight home to Denver with a feeding tube and oxygen (and 2 anxiety ridden parents), as well as many other obstacles thrown his way. Our dog unexpectedly passed away while we were in Hawaii along with some other scary family-related situations. It was the most trying time of our lives, but the sense of gratefulness we have now for Sawyer, his doctors and nurses, modern medicine, our family and friends, and life itself is unmatched. Our lives were instantly changed for the better the second he was born. He is so smiley and happy you would never know how much he's been through. He inspires us every day to be the best versions of ourselves and not take a day with your loved ones for granted. 

I still struggle with the trauma from his birth and NICU stay but am so proud of how far we have all come. I am so grateful for this community who makes the lonely days feel a lot less lonely. “